Flying Without A Broom
Unexpected Wedding
By Ruskbyte
Chapter Two
~ Unexpected Wedding ~
The hunter paused. His prey was nearby; he could hear the boy talking, but his attention had momentarily been caught by a very pretty crack in the wall he was slinking past. Harry stared at the crack, thoroughly mesmerised by the sight, for nearly two minutes before shaking his head and returning his attention back to the three figures in front of him. Fortunately they had not moved far during his distraction.
Draco Malfoy, Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle had somehow managed to acquire replacement clothing for themselves since fleeing from the Three Broomsticks. This fact, quite naturally, prompted Harry to find the need to dispense with these just as he had their original garments. It was such wonderful luck that he had stumbled upon them in the course of his little game this afternoon.
"I'm going to kill him!" Malfoy was shouting, "I don't care if father and Aunt Bella want him alive as a present for the Dark Lord! I will kill him if it's the last thing I do!"
Crabbe and Goyle were nodding in dumb agreement as Harry succeeded in sneaking right up behind the trio of Slytherins. He had been crouched down low during his approach, so that they would not spot him until the very last second. He grinned broadly, almost splitting his face in half, as he reached out an tapped his nemesis on the shoulder. Leaning in close as Malfoy turned around he found himself almost brushing noses with the pale haired, and even paler skinned, young wizard.
"Boo."
Malfoy's eyes grew wide and seemed in danger of popping out of his skull as he realized who was standing so close behind him. Harry's grin was one of demented glee as Draco sucked in a deep breath before screaming in stark terror.
"YEEEEEEAAAAARRRRGGGHH!!"
Harry literally fell on his arse laughing as Malfoy threw his arms into the air, turned on a heel and ran for his life, Crabbe and Goyle in close pursuit. The three Slytherins were running as if the Devil himself were chasing after them and Harry found himself scarcely able to breath amidst his gales of laughter.
Waving his hand in the general direction of the fleeing trio his laughter promptly redoubled as their newly acquired clothes promptly disappeared. Malfoy skidded to a halt, almost being run over by Goyle in the process, and let out an effeminate shriek before covering his exposed regions and resuming to run at an even faster pace.
"AAAAAHHHHH!!"
It took Harry a good many minutes before he calmed down enough to regain his footing. Wiping the tears from his eyes, chuckling all the while, he resumed walking through the streets of the village. On one level he was vaguely aware that this was a somewhat dangerous venture, but his mind was so perfectly distracted by the sheer volume of sensory input it was receiving that Harry could scarcely be bothered by such a slight niggling feeling.
Everything seemed so much... more. More colourful. More vibrant. More alive. It was a wonderful sensation and Harry was revelling in it. It was an experience the likes of which he had never before imagined. The colours, the sounds, the smells... well, all right, the smells weren't such a wonderful thing, but other than that the world had suddenly become a wondrous place, with so much for him to see and feel.
Harry couldn't help it and soon found himself skipping playfully down the street, occasionally twirling around, humming any tune that came to mind. He had just swung around on lamp post and was preparing to move onto the next one, which he planned to swing around as well, when a flash of red caught his eye. Harry's eyes widened with surprise, anticipation and delight as he quickly ran for cover in the nearest alley. Peering out from around the corner, he watched as two of his friends approached.
"Bloody hell," Ron was cursing loudly. "Where the hell could he have gotten to? I mean, for Merlin's sake, what is he doing running around by himself when he knows the Death Eaters are out trying to kill him?!"
"I think you should relax, Ronald."
"Relax? Relax?! How could I possibly be relaxed at a time like this?"
"It's easy really, if you know how. Either way, it will be much easier trying to find Harry if you spent more time actually looking for him and less time shouting out rhetorical questions."
Watching as his best friend in the world strolled past, completely unaware of his presence, Harry was deeply touched by the concern Ron was showing for him. Sure they had had their ups and downs over the years, but in the end Harry knew Ron would always stand by him. Even if he didn't know quite where Harry was at the moment. Say...
This was going to be so much fun. He would get to play a prank on Ron, revenge for all those times Fred and George had done so --Ron was their brother after all, so it sort of worked out-- and at the same time he could help his friend take that all important first step into a relationship with the girl Harry knew Ron was secretly pining for. This was going to be so much fun!
Tip-toeing quietly behind the pair, listening as Ron continued to complain as they searched for him, Harry steadily crept closer. He was delighted to observe, whereas Ron was oblivious, that the girl listening tolerantly to Ron's panic filled tirade. This, Harry felt, was a sure sign that she returned Ron's feelings. This was wonderful as it simplified everything and meant that Harry could not possible mess things up. They were so clearly in love and it was just as clearly up to him to force them to act upon their true feelings.
He drew out his wand and pointed it at his friends' backs, breaking into a grin as he thought of the favour he was doing them. They would be so grateful for his help.
"Ropes!" he shouted, not really bothering to try and use the correct incantation which Flitwick had drilled into them several years earlier. After all, Harry was the Boy Who Lived. Since when did he ever do anything the normal way?
A length of rope appeared out of nowhere, encircling the surprised pair before they could even turn around to the sound of Harry's voice. The ropes wrapped around them, from their ankles all the way up to their shoulders. Now this was the brilliant part of Harry's plan. The part which would ensure that his friends would get together. Simply put; he was getting them together himself. Using the ropes.
"Harry? Harry! What d'you think you're doing, mate?" asked Ron as he and Luna Lovegood toppled to the ground, firmly trussed up and bound together with seemingly no end of rope. As luck would have it, the bindings had settled around them at the precise moment when they were facing each other whilst turning around. "Harry!"
Bouncing with delight and clapping his hands Harry waved his wand at his friends and said, "Naked!"
Without further a due, Ron's clothes proceeded to disappear in much the same fashion as Draco's had earlier. At the same time, Luna's clothes vanished as well, leaving the pair bound bodily together with absolutely nothing separating them. Harry was thrilled that everything was working out so well. There was no way they could not get together now.
"Ro-o-on and Lu-u-na starkers in the park," he sang, smiling down at his two friends as they struggled against the ropes binding them together. "What will they get up to, when it gets dark?"
"Harry! Give back our clothes! Now!" demanded Ron, his face flushed such a flaming colour of red that his hair seemed pale by comparison. "Harry! Harry!!"
Kneeling down next to them, Harry looked from Ron to Luna and back several times. He was still grinning happily at the success of his plan when he suddenly turned his attention to Luna, who was staring up at him with implacable calm. She blinked languidly at him as he leaned close to her, ignoring Ron's futile attempts to free himself. That was his friend, after all, always the one that played hard to get.
"Be gentle with him, Ducks," Harry told her solemnly, "it's his first time."
"I shall. It's mine as well," Luna replied calmly.
This was the one thing about Luna that simply delighted Harry. She was so accepting of his help and generosity. He had to blink back tears as the emotion almost got the better of him. It was so beautiful to know that he would be the one to help his friends through this. It never once occurred to him that it was him that got them into it in the first place, but even if it had, it was doubtful that anything would have turned out different.
"Very well, then, let's get started," Harry declared, adopting a stern expression. He looked piercingly at Ron and told him, "You do."
"I do?" asked Ron, perfectly confused.
Harry grinned at his friend's answer and then turned to Luna and said, "You do too."
Luna considered him for a moment before bobbing her head and agreeing, "I do."
"Excellent!" Harry exclaimed. He pulled his wand out of his robes, much to Ron's alarm, and then continued. "By the powers invented, er, invested in me by... uh... someone important, I hereby announce, I mean pronounce you; husband," he tapped his wand against Luna's forehead and then turned to repeat the action right between Ron's eyes, "and wife."
"What? Hey!" Ron goggled up at Harry, at once both amazed and horrified that Harry was presuming to officiate this rather impromptu and unofficial wedding and also affronted that his friend had cast him in role of the bride, rather than the groom.
Harry leaned forward and stage-whispered to Luna, "You may now kiss the bride."
Luna did just that.
"Now remember to make sure your first-born is named after me," Harry told them as he rose to his feet and began to skip away. His job her was done. His mission; completed. Chalk up another one for the amazing Boy Who Lived... matchmaker extraordinaire!
"Harry! No! Come back!" Ron's shouts echoed behind him as Harry swiftly departed. Clearly his friend wanted to share in the joy of his blessed union. It was tempting to be sure, but Harry could not bring himself to intrude. Particularly during their honeymoon.
"Harry, come back here, you bastard! Harry!"
Eyes ablaze with an inner mirth that had not been let out to play in a long, long time, Harry danced down the streets of Hogsmeade, humming a catchy tune as his friend's cries of delight slowly faded into the distance.
"HARRRRRRRRREEEEEE!!!!"
TBC...